He says, I promise to look for you as long as you need me to, and then he says, Go.
I’ve been putting off writing this post all day, because I really didn’t want it to be just another ‘goals post,’ which I’d one day browse over and see the goals my silly young self once set out to do, and then didn’t even come close to accomplishing.
I should, however, mention I found out some bad news today. I won’t get into the details, because I don’t like talking about work on here, but I can’t get the days off for Vegas (insert some serious tears here). It’s just not possible, with it being so close to Christmas and all, and the other guy who I’m partnered with is away then.
Despite how much I wanted to improve my marathon time, after finding that out today, I actually felt slightly relieved. I feel like I have a lot going on these days: I’m moving out of my apartment in 16 days, have a huge financial exam in 30, have hit a new financial low when it comes to my budget and am finding life just very busy.
I’ve been trying to fit my runs in, but finding it really hard and stressful, but now I’m looking forward to simply running to clear my mind, and not having a set distance to cover each week.
So, there’s that. I am, however, joining another Marathon Clinic (with my same group) this January - April, so for sure I will be running a spring marathon (undetermined) and fall one (Berlin!).
O.k…November/Life-in-General goals:
- To move out. Obviously I know this will happen, but I live in such a toxic zone right now. I’ve never felt so uncomfortable around another person before. My roommate makes me nervous to be home, which is a terrible thing to live with. I think once I move out, despite saying goodbye to my beautiful condo of nearly 2 years, it will be a wonderfully positive thing, which will also allow me to save money…
- Save money. Occasionally I dabble into money on this blog, because money is a huge part of life. I am 100% independent from my parents, so every dollar I spend, I earned. But that’s the problem… I spend it all. I do not save. Like, at all. This month I need to (wo)man up and actually review my budget, and set goals for myself.
- Lose Weight. I know, I know… broken record player here… But here’s the thing: E loses weight = E is happier. Shallow? Pathetic? Whatever, it’s true. I miss that feeling of catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror and liking what I see. I haven’t liked what I’ve seen in a really long time. I want to slip into my pink-plaid shirt and know I have accomplished something, completed a goal. (I’ll address #3 in more detail later this week.)
- Material items be gone! This is already in progress, but it’s a lot harder than I thought. I can literally be holding a shirt I haven’t worn in 3 years, and would always choose something else to wear before it, yet I don’t want to give it away. Must remember: 1. Out of sight out of mind, and 2. there is someone out there who would love it and actually wear it!
- Study. Because I have a massive ass exam at the end of the month and omigod I can’t fail it.
- Run and/or gym at least 3 times a week.
- Do not hate on myself if I can’t run and/or gym 3 times a week. I’m human: a busy-bee of a human.
- Read more. I used to read a lot. But then one day, when i discovered this thing called a TiVo my reading severely started to lack. I love getting lost in a book, but rarely choose to read over numbing my brain with tv. Sad. I must change this. Ps Is there a tumblr book club?
- Sleep more. Sometimes it’ll be 12:30 at night, and I’ll be so freaking tired, yet I’m doodling about on facebook or tumblr, doing literally nothing, yet I keep clicking on something, as apposed to just going to sleep. Sleep > Computer.
Introduce myself to you. I had really positive feedback on this post (thank you!), which I must say, made me feel better about “coming out.” I thought I was ready,even created a “Hello, my name is E___” post, and then quickly drafted it, because… oh.my. God. NO. So, I hope to still do it. Just slowly.Those are my goals. They’re realistic. And needed. They’re all for me. To better myself and better my life.
Oh, I’ve also deactivated my email/messages. I don’t know if it’s just me, but I HATE getting voicemails, I just assume I was fired, someone died, something really bad happened or someone is going to yell at me. So I pretty much never ever check them, well… that’s how my ‘messages’ section became to me. I’d see a new message and freeze, because I just assumed it was a mean message. And I hated that. So, I solved that problem fairly easily, and am now a lot happier for it. Not even sure if anyone noticed/cares, but that’s the reason, if anyone was wondering.
Anywho, this post was all sorts of random, but point is:
Welcome November, it’s nice to see you again. Let’s play. Love E.
Name Everyone is Gay
Location Brooklyn, New York
First Post April 2010Kristin and Dannielle are girls who like girls, and together they give advice to those who are confused about sexuality, dating, love, and dressing up like Super Woman. Anyone is invited to submit a question — the only requirement is that you’re looking for an honest and candid answer to your problem. Sincere and funny, they added a weekly webcast to the site in July. Dannielle created Lesbians Who Look Like Justin Bieber and Kristin pursues a Master’s Degree in Gender Studies.
Also check out…
52 Bad Dudes
Every Friday, Adam Sidwell uploads an original illustration created for his “Bad Dudes” project. Incredible work!Flight 001
The joy of air travel without the magic of full-body scans.American Drink
Celebrate the art of the good drink with outstanding writing from a group of gifted storytellers.Photo by Shervin Lainez.
He’s not ugly. This isn’t about symmetry; his face is fine. It’s more that he is bland, invisible in the way certain men in their thirties are. He has brown hair and brown eyes. He’s a little doughy in the belly. He is neither tall nor short, and his clothes are only distinct in that they’re completely indistinct. The first time I saw him, he was wearing loose jeans and a striped polo shirt. The requisite sneakers. When a man dresses like a boy, turn and run…This guy, I thought, he has no idea how invisible he is. Meanwhile, I’m invincible. It’s funny how close those two words are.
Thanks to Flavorwire for this. I adore online literary journals, and I think you should, too. This is a great list (be sure to check “hungry for more” at the end, which notes fwriction favorites: The Collagist, Annalemma, and failbetter).
(Source: fwriction)
Do yourself a favor and read something wonderful this morning.
The morning train was eerily empty this morning, so much so that when the conductor spied me running for it, he actually waited, and re-opened the doors. I sat in a space with an empty seat on either side, a man sprawled out across three at the back of the row. A stop later, a woman entered, her…
(via trainwrite)
(via fwriction)
Don’t cry, I’m sorry to have deceived you so much, but that’s how life is.
Tossing the note back onto the oak, Karen went to Richard. She settled her body into his, pulled him close as tightly as she could. Richard opened his blanket and covered her shoulders. There was warmth there. Karen thought to ask if he wanted to finish making breakfast, but she couldn’t speak. Instead, she leaned into her husband and believed, for a moment, he was holding her up.
Justin Bieber Performing at the AMA’s.
Rejection is a work of art: “No Strong Dramatic Situations.”
(Thanks to Pugilist Press for directing me to this.)
(Source: fwriction)
